What does your ideal home look like?
The concept of home goes beyond mere structures, embodying emotional connections and nurturing environments. Many people often debate the differences between house or home when thinking about where they live. Historically, homes served joint families, while modern times favour nuclear setups due to societal shifts. Emotional bonds uphold the true value of a home, contrasting with the increasing materialism that sees homes as mere assets. The story of a man’s search for the perfect hill cottage shows his struggles with financial limitations. It also explores his wish for emotional satisfaction in housing. Ultimately, the essence of a home lies in the feelings of comfort and safety it provides. It emphasises the importance of harmony among its inhabitants. This significance is greater than its physical attributes.
Home
Home evokes an image of a cosy nook. It provides a feeling of safety and warmth. A roof offers shelter, nourishing strong bonds among its occupants. (SASEE)
(1) Not only a structure
Home is not merely a construction of brick and mortar but a collection of feelings and vibes of the inhabitants. It all makes a house a home. Home is the place where the soul and body live in unison. Calling any construction a home is inappropriate; it is like a body without a soul.
(2) Vibrant
Home is a vibrant entity, where one spends quality time with all those one loves. The home has been a priority since antiquity. A place that gives solace, comfort and soul-soothing is akin to heaven. Every individual has a wish to have a house that one can call one’s home.
Sanatan tradition
In the Sanatan tradition, home is equated with a phase of life. The whole life span was divided into four phases to have a modest and regularised life. These phases were termed as Ashram. Of the four “Grihasth Ashram” was considered more responsible and necessary. A “Grihasth” (Householder) was the one who, after marriage, begets children and raises a family. The patriarch was responsible for the proper upkeep of the family, home and household expenditure. The female member was responsible for household chores. There was a distinct “division of labour” and responsibility.
(1) Householder
The word “Grihasth” has a Sanskrit root “Grih” meaning a home or dwellings. A phase that emphasises worldly affairs, raising a family, rearing children, has to have a home at its hub. The home used to be a central point around which all family members used to revolve. This is still in practice.
Nuclear family
In contrast to the olden period, the modern period is different in one major way. There was a concept of a joint family. In modern times, this has been replaced by the “Nuclear Family”. It is a new concept. In this setup, every sibling of a parent lives separately with their respective families. Financial constraints, frequent infighting, differences of opinion and selfish motives led to the fragmentation of the joint family. Job or service requirements compel people to leave their parental house. They must settle with their family somewhere else.
House is essential
Apart from this, housing requirements have retained their charm. The house has been viewed as an asset, which, in fact, it is. It is earned and, thus, holds a special place in a person’s life. The increasing materialistic thought process has made what was once a place of emotional bonding a mere structure. People are vying for more houses than they need to earn money by rental income and add to their assets.
(1) Size is immaterial
For a house to become an ideal home, size is immaterial. The space needs to be cosy and comfortable. More than that, the positivity of the members counts a lot to make it happen. A house is, hence, not only an enclosed space further subdivided into small chambers or rooms. It is a roof which shelters its inmates and gives them a permanent location and identity.
(2) Rented accommodations
People in rented houses often feel discomfort. This is especially true for those with limited resources. They often change their addresses. It is a compulsion, and one is bound to pass through this phase in one’s lifetime. Those who are allotted a house by their employers also have to vacate that house once they relinquish their job. At times, it becomes traumatic for people who become emotionally attached to the house.
(3) Urbanisation
Even a hut, made up of mud and hay, can be comforting if people feel secure, safe and satisfied. It was not far, but a few decades back, housing was not so costly. People manage to have their own house. Fast-expanding urbanisation has swallowed a major chunk of land to cater to civic needs like housing, schools, hospitals and roads. The increasing population has caused a shrinking of housing areas. The plots of land are becoming small, causing pigeonhole-type dwellings devoid of proper ventilation and overburdened civic amenities.
(4) Dream home
Like the majority of people he, our protagonist, too wanted to own a house. He, though, was not desperate. Aware of his position and financial status, he decided to postpone it till the appropriate time. He knew his efforts would be futile, as they required a significant amount of money. His dream was to own a small cottage, nestled in the hills. It would be surrounded by verdant greenery with a mountain stream nearby. Solitary in nature, he wanted a secluded but contented time in his cottage during old age. A palatial bungalow or spacious mansion was never his wish. Contrarily, he wished for a cosy and comfortable corner where he could spend time gardening and growing vegetables.
(5) Hills calling
The rippling sound of a flowing mountain stream is sweet, melodious music. The natural ambience and meadows would attract him. The fragrant and crisp air drew him to the hills. He enjoyed the cool atmosphere of hilly areas whenever he happened to be there.
Gangetic Plains and hills
The Northern Gangetic Plains of India are flat and fertile. Life is easy and less strenuous here. Everything is available with a little effort. It is the reason why this region is densely populated and crowded. The traffic snarls, cacophony and polluted air are the bonuses for its residents.
Peaceful life
Most peace-loving and law-abiding people wish for a peaceful and secluded life. They want the barest of interference. It becomes all the more important after senescence. Few want to live on hills amidst Nature. They are aware of the difficult life in the hills, where the daily routine is strenuous. It is the time which finally decides the course of the future journey.
(1) An uphill task
Constraints of life compel us to choose a different path. Job compulsions, education, and health care are but a few impediments that force the change in ideas. Many rosy ideas take a back seat. House construction is an expensive venture. Arrangement of money for a mediocre with a meagre pay package used to be an uphill task. Life is like walking on a tightrope. The loan was beyond reach. A few decades earlier, housing loan was not easy. High interest rates and low loan amounts were insufficient to own a house. Having no choice, people would wait for a suitable time to have a house that they can call their home. The government later brought low-cost housing schemes, which eased many.
(2) The procedure
People would get their allotment letter through the method of drawing lots. After clearing dues, the house/plot owners completed the formalities and registered the property. They then handed over the legal documents, including the possession letter. The allotted “houses” were poorly built row houses. They needed to be constructed de novo. There was no scope for greenery plantation.
Making a structure a home
It is observed that people’s aura and energy affect the place and dwelling. It is true of a house as well. A house is built with the hard-earned money, toil and sweat. A lot of emotion is attached to the structure of brick-and-mortar. The dwelling people and their energies make that structure a vibrant place. It is essential that members of the family, going to share the space should be in harmony. The house, when become a home, treats its inmates suitably. People with negative energies, dissatisfaction and an indifferent attitude turn their home into a place filled with heavy negativity. For them, their house is not worth living. People of this mentality are mentally sick. They not only fail to respect their prized possession, but also live in a quarrelsome atmosphere. Without introspection, they blame their house for everything.
In the end
It is rightly said that no one ever gets the whole world. Compromising, caliberations and adjustments are necessary for a peaceful life, especially during the fag end of life. People need to learn to respect things they have with them. Considering everything, the gift of the Almighty, they respect life and enjoy it. The feeling of being a “proud owner” of a house gives a sense of achievement and self-confidence. A home gives freedom to live the way one wants to. Respect your home, and it will reciprocate appropriately.
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