In this article, we will explore the distinction between self-evaluation and self-praise in personal and professional contexts. It highlighted that critical self-assessment is vital for growth. Honest feedback from friends aids in correct self-perception. It is emphasised that true character is best judged by others. This is better than through self-aggrandisement or excessive praise.
Table of contents
Key Takeaways
- The article discusses the negative aspects of egotistical behavior and the impact of narcissistic personalities in professional settings.
- Self-evaluation is crucial for personal growth, while self-praise can undermine credibility and promote narcissism.
- Honest introspection and understanding one’s strengths and weaknesses foster better self-awareness.
- Constructive feedback from friends and relatives is vital for effective self-appraisal and confidence building.
- Ultimately, humility and external validation enrich one’s perception while avoiding extremes in self-assessment.
Introduction
A little earlier, he was attending a meeting with his boss. Sitting and listening to every word that was spoken there and jotting down important and pertinent points. He noticed that the boss was not leaving any opportunity to highlight his “achievements” and abilities. The loudmouth boss was repeatedly boasting about his qualities. Obsequious participants were cajoling in a wake to gain the attention of the boss for parochial gain.
Egotistical approach
Ignoring all these unnecessary things, he was sincerely busy with the task and doing the work. His boss, who had an intimidating feeling against straightforward persons, was fearful. The latent fear sometimes started gnawing at him from inside. The boss would summon and scold him over any frivolous matter. This is the way a self-absorbed person usually behaves. It was hurting for a sincere and simple person like him.
Self-evaluation
(a) Self-abusive/critic
Dispassionately talking about oneself is difficult, nay, daunting. People often have very high opinions about themselves and do not want to hear anything against them. It is psychological and, to a certain extent, acceptable as well. Some become ruthless against themselves and hold themselves responsible for everything wrong. (Mind Journal)
(b) Self-obsessive
On the other hand, people with an egotistical attitude garrulously talk about themselves. Narrow minded individuals have an excessively high opinion of themselves. They do not hesitate to insult or demean others. Both conditions are extreme and indicative of mental feebleness. (Psychology Today)
Honest introspection
(a) Critical evaluation
A critical self-evaluation is essential. It comes through rigorous practice and honest introspection. Self-criticism is not always negative. It is a self-healing process. If done in a controlled and focused way, it is beneficial for the growth and development of an individual. Self-critical thinking is a process of honest self-evaluation to find strengths and weaknesses. It aids in calibrating them according to the situation for better results.
(b) Knowing strengths and weaknesses
Knowing about SWOT (Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats) greatly helps in finding out the faults and loopholes. It suggests ways to plug them, stop leakages and means to overcome them. It is a healthy practice yet, egotistics consider it “self-deeming”. The loquacious arrogance is the greatest impediment to healthy thinking. It varies across individuals.
Eulogy
(a) Catalytic effect
Praising acts as a catalyst. Eulogising a good work boosts the morale of the doer and motivates him to do more good. It pampers and releases good hormone that boosts positivity. It is, nonetheless, possible only when the superiors or evaluators are honest and free from their own inflated self-ego.
(b) Self-awareness
Self-awareness is equally important because it keeps a person grounded and remains realistic. Contrary to cajoling, eulogy does not overhype the qualities for petty gains. It is sycophancy which does not go well. While eulogising, people recognise the good work or action. It decently tells about the worth of action, explaining the task performed by the doer.
(c) Overdose of self-praise
The overdose of self-praise causes loss of an individual’s credibility. It establishes them as a hollow character without substance or gravity. Self-praise is, thus, a negative trait which needs to be avoided. People try to avoid such a person. One such trait is Narcissism, which is highly negative. People ailing with this are mendacious and garrulous. They always have a high opinion of themselves and portray themselves as larger than life. They want others to revolve around them else they try to intimidate others. We see many such people around, mindlessly boasting about their “achievements” and goodness.
Flogging a dead horse
Having a very high self-opinion and often imposing it on others is always lopsided. People having this type of thought process are deeply engrossed in “Me and mine are the best”. Anything good or best has to be theirs. They never bother about others but always try to keep themselves in the centre. They ruthlessly intrude and impose their “superiority” on others. Expecting a dispassionate evaluation from them is like flogging a dead horse.
Self-evaluation vs self-praise
(a) Two different things
Self-evaluation and self-praise are two entirely different things. Self-evaluation is an honest way to know about oneself. It is methodical and scientific. In contrast, self-praise is mostly based on whims and ego. The egotistical mindset is a great impediment to an honest self-appraisal. As a result, talking about oneself becomes partial. It needs to be tested by proper scrutiny.
(b) Role of friends and relatives
Friends and relatives can play a significant role in moulding a strong personality by providing sincere and constructive feedback. Knowing about the positive side of one’s personality is essential for building confidence. Equally important is having honest and dispassionate knowledge of one’s weaknesses. Self-appraisal is possible only when a dispassionate introspection is done.
Inner consciousness
Personal traits are known to the self. They are, nonetheless, the carefully guarded secrets, always kept under lock and key, never to be divulged. To show one’s positive and proactive image is the intrinsic wish. It is the inner consciousness which knows every in and out of an individual. A timid and hesitant one knows about oneself. Similarly, a compassionate person behaves appropriately, and it resonates. Sometimes, though, a thorough gentleman does not know about his personality traits. the unconscious good deeds bring a good picture ahead. Deeds are self-speaking. They leave an indelible impression. Persistent good deeds or behaviour become a general image of the person.
In the end
In the backdrop of the above discourse, no opinion can be absolute. It would be a cursory statement about anyone’s personality. A decent and down-to-earth person will feel hesitant to speak about themselves. For him, it is not a good practice. An ideal situation would be that others say good for anyone. It is the testament of one’s positive personality trait. A humble individual would insist on others forming an opinion. At the most, the doer can put forth the points in his favour. He can tell people about the good that has been done. Using their prudence, people will decide about the worth of an individual. One need not be overhyped and not be rude to oneself. The good or bad is subjective; thus, it has to be decided accordingly. Extreme views in favour of or against are not good for healthy development. It needs to be rethought.
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