If you could go back in time and give your younger self advice, what would it be?

The write up reflects on the experiences and lessons of an old man as he walks through a familiar yet transformed city. He contemplates his younger self, sharing insights on the complexities of life, relationships, and personal growth. He realises that people are shaped by their circumstances, and transparency is rare. The passage of time has not dulled his youthful spirit but rather enriched his understanding of human nature, emphasising the futility in trying to please everyone. Ultimately, he reflects on the joy of solitude, recognising that true companionship is scarce and that personal fulfillment often lies in embracing one’s solitude amidst nature.

The old door

On a crisp, cool morning, walking on a promenade flanked by tall palm trees invigorated him. He preferred to walk alone, letting his thoughts wander and watching for curious things. On one such occasion, he saw a door surrounded by irregular growth of wild plants. He didn’t notice the door before. The worn planks were loosely closed, and morning light peeked out from its slits. He gently pushed the door; it opened with a soft screeching sound. Entering the door, he was amazed to see a strange world that looked like an old city he used to live in years ago as an adolescent.

Soliloquising

Looking around, he was walking on the street. He didn’t notice that he had started soliloquising. Occasionally he would smile, and at times his face would become a bit terse. A reel was unwinding before his mental eyes, and he continued talking on them while walking and watching things around. Things have not changed much. A tonga passed past him. It used to be a decent ride, and he was pleased to see that it was still in use. Suddenly, the tonga vanished from the vision. A car honked from behind. Looking at the car, he stepped aside. The car passed swiftly. Time is passing, and so are we, he thought. He was walking in the manner he used to since his formative years, picking up experiences.

Senescence

Moving from place to place with the caravan of thoughts, he saw many things. They were curious and amusing. More than seven decades have passed, he doesn’t feel change in himself. He felt he was in his adolescence, novice and raw, unseasoned and immature. He lived in the imaginary ideal world where things should be ideal, spick and span. At senescence, armed with the wealth of experience, he can now see hidden things and feel hidden intentions of people.

People are not simple

People are not so simple nor the things. It is their ever changing situations which shape a person mentally and physically.  As a young man he would often becomes restless and express his feelings before his ostensible friends. He paid price of his simplicity with losing mental peace and also future prospects. Like others, he often searched god but didn’t see Him, nor does he has any experience of it. He kept on soliloquising, murmuring to himself he said that he was unaware of the real harshness of life. Life was not a easy pool where a person could swim leisurely, enjoying the star facilities and nice drink. It has been a roller coaster ride. Several people came to life and later volatilised without leaving a spoor of their existence.

Learning from experiences

People left their impressions on his mind. The scratches and wounds are healed, but their traces are still on his body. These traces swiftly transport him back in time. The penumbra of light and shadow has given a mixed-bag feeling. Later, he realised that people are slaves to situations, and they do what a situation warrants. In different situations, they behave differently.  Expecting anything from anyone is counterproductive, but everyone teaches something.

People and fleeting world

The temporal world is ever-changing. Things and people change, and so do the situations. Enemies become friends and friends become foes. Those who were daggers drawn embrace each other. Deciding anything on face value is deceiving oneself. The uncertainty of things and the nature of people sometimes put an honest, straightforward person in a difficult situation. People must not interfere in others’ affairs. The future can’t be predicted, and those who claim to do it are not honest with people.  Precautions are necessary. While expressing personal thoughts, care should be taken. He experiences that animosity must be limited to the degree that it should have scope and space for future friendship. It is often expressed in everyday life. He was talking in a manner as if he were talking to his younger self when he was twenty years old.

People are blend of good and bad

Honesty is the best policy. Since childhood he heard it, so much so that it became etched on his mental slate. The practical world is altogether different. Society and people are not absolute. It is utopia. People are a mix of good and bad. Their behaviour varies with the degree of their self motive. They easily change their side, leaving the honest one in a lurch. The condition becomes excruciatingly painful. It becomes difficult to believe that a best friend has deceived us, but that’s life. A blindfolded faith is self-destructive. We must entertain our ideas with a pinch of doubt.

Impossible to please all

Diving deep in his thoughts, he took a deep breath. The carousel was moving like he used to see in a sort of Raree show. A face emerged with a unique personality who has a shifting goalpost tendency. People with this quality are hard to please and never adjust. Conversely, they try to make others obey their commands and accept their attitude. Endeavouring to please all leave a simple person dejected and desperate.. Never try to please everyone, which you can’t, he whispered. People expect too much but refuse to give almost nothing in return. The one way traffic may be beneficial in tackling crowds, but in a relationship it doesn’t work.

Respect and care are mutual and reciprocal. One sided adjustment with someone or even stooping to a point of compromise for the sake of the relationship is harmful. It is a common experience that one-sided adjustments yield nothing and lose self-respect. The earlier it is understood, the better it will be. It applies to everyone irrespective of gender in a relationship, especially in a nuptial one. No one wants to dance to the tune of another. If males want respect, it is necessary that they give it too and vice versa. The equation often does not come to mind for a youth, yet it is most important. Love and affection are a two-way street, quid pro quo. (Psychology Spot)

Lone, but not alone

Everyone is alone. In the world of the mad race, it is not only difficult but almost impossible to get good companionship. Hoping to have an understanding partner or friend is like searching for a needle in a heap of hay. For gregarious people, this is a difficult condition, but a solitary one who enjoys self-companionship is relatively happier. Solitary ones don’t always search for company to spend quality time with or share their joy. They may appear lone but they are seldom alone and happily lead life in isolation with Nature as their best friend. Enjoying the bliss of solitude in the vicinity of Nature, away from the crowd of trickster and self-centered persons, such people are a happy lot.

Personal choice

Opting for a particular way of life is a personal choice; after all, a person’s life is a personal thing. While he spoke, a little Prenia was making a call, breaking his drowsiness. He returned to reality, where there was a clump of trees and, standing under their overstory, loudly talking to the unseen. 

Further reads:

• Introspection and Relationships: Finding Balance in Family Dynamics
• The Power of Good Wishes and Emotional Connections
• Embracing Solitude: The Beauty of Alone Time in Nature
• The Search for Ideal Public Figures: An Ongoing Challenge
• Walking: The Best Way to Keep Fit and Healthy

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