Describe a positive thing a family member has done for you.
The content discusses the concept of family, highlighting its definitions in both biological and social contexts. It explores how families evolve, emphasising emotional bonds fostered through shared experiences. The narrative contrasts positive family dynamics, depicted in the Ramayana, with destructive behaviours seen in the Mahabharata. It addresses current societal issues, such as conflicts within families and the diminishing value of mutual respect and love. The text calls for nurturing relationships and maintaining the balance between individual rights and familial duties for a healthy family environment.
Family: An over-hyped institution which has been the most flouted too. Everybody talks about it at their convenience. A family is a group of organisms that are linked with each other by filial or ancestral bonds. Members of a family share some or most of the genetic characteristics and behaviours. Individual members can have minor morphological differences, but they are distinct and can easily be identified. In the plant world, plants and flowers of the pea family, for example, not only have similar characteristics, but their behaviour is also similar. Apart from minor structural differences in having woody stems or tendrils or twiner, their floral organs are distinct and can easily be spotted among other plant families.
In terms of human beings, the concept of family is not much different. A family has been defined as a group of close persons related to each other by marriage, birth or adoption. A family has parents and siblings. In a joint family, all siblings and their families live together in a common house with their parents and grandparents, brothers, sisters, cousins and niece.
Members of a family usually live together, at least up to a certain period. After attaining self-sufficiency or getting a job at a different location, members chose to live separately or in the same family enclosures. In India, it is rather a new thing, and generally, it is due to job compulsion. Still, in any case, they stay connected to each other and frequent parental home often. Living separately in the same or different cities doesn’t affect the strength of their bonds.
How did the family system start? Was it necessary to have a family? These are some questions that occasionally simmer in minds and eagerly try to get an answer. It is because of the fact that people often read in newspapers, watch on TV, and/or on social media platforms that many harrowing crimes occur within the periphery of the family, which is considered sacrosanct. Atrocities against aged parents by their siblings, bloody infighting, and sometimes gore for the greed of wealth and getting more than their share are commonly heard.
The family evolved alongside human development. Humans began living in communities within caves, engaging in hunting, cooking, and dining together. Early life was simple and limited to fulfilling frugal necessities. With the advancement of time as humans evolved further, so did their necessities. Community life must have allowed mutual interaction and the development of emotional bonds. This must have led to the evolution of small units within a community. It formalised as human development reached another level when they started settled life. With the invention of agriculture, eating habits changed. Human beings started living in large habitation termed villages. Thus, the lives of humans changed to settlers.
The new way of life augmented the development of feelings about persons and things, and emotions became an intrinsic part of the human psyche. The feeling of “Mine” and “Thine” crept in. It solidified with time, strengthening the family system.
The family system stemmed from the idea of mutual cooperation and help. The members were stratified, and a hierarchy was established. It was a good and amicable way of moving ahead. Parents were given the highest place in a family. It was right, too, because of the simple reason that parents are at the fountainhead. They start a family, beget progenies, nourish them and educate them to lay a future responsible citizen. Parents have not only been equated with but they are like God and Goddess. They selflessly do everything possible to keep the family running and flourishing.
Respect and love with mutual trust and a sense of security are the cornerstones of a sound family system. Ideally, it is a closed group of people with interconnected necessities, support and care. It is like a cocoon for toddlers and a safe place for children. It provides emotional support to growing teenage children; keeping a close watch on every movement of children ensures a workable solution for the teenage members passing through the transition.
As has been mentioned earlier, family is a place filled with warmth of love, empathy, compassion and considerations. It gives many rights but at the same time, it expects some duties too. It is nothing like a codified law but is an ethical and moral conduct which comes naturally in an individual. Sometimes, though, a stark deviation is seen in it.
The Epic of the Mahabharata is a powerful tale of deceit driven by selfish motives, dishonesty, injustice, and betrayal within a family. These negative traits stem from excessive ambition and envy. When personal ambition is unchecked, it can lead to destruction, especially when loyalty to one party overrides fairness and merit. It is crucial to keep a balance among these qualities.
The increasing crime, especially within the confines of the family, is consternating. Gory infighting for property and rights is frequent in the media. The supposed pious relation of brother-sister, brother-brother, mother-son, and father-daughter is fast losing its sheen. Atrocities and injustice have become routine. It was in the past, it is current and it shall continue in future. The negativity is intrinsic and, to a great extent, inherited.
A closed group of people where a teenage girl doesn’t feel safe and lives under the shadow of terror can’t be a family. On the same token, if a real brother is seen treacherously seizing the legitimate right of his brother, it can’t also be considered a family.
A closed group of people where a teenage girl doesn’t feel safe and lives under the shadow of terror can’t be a family. On the same token, if a real brother is seen treacherously seizing the legitimate right of his brother, it can’t also be considered a family. Mahabharat narrates such incidences at length and underscores the importance of personal liberty, respecting others’ rights and recognising them.
Contrary to Mahabharata, another great epic, Ramayana, tells at length about an ideal family. It preaches about the duties of each family member, including parents and siblings. It covers the negative traits as well. Through Kaykeyie and her hunched aide Manthara, the epic successfully and vividly narrates the negativity and its ultimate fallouts. Ram was exiled to deep forests for fourteen years, and Bharat, his younger brother, was given the throne. In a positive twist, Bharat declined the throne and rebuked his mother for her deceitful action. He went on to plead and bring Ram back to Ayodhya. Failing, he ruled the kingdom as a Pro-tem ruler, considering his elder brother as its legitimate heir.
The two epics descriptively tell about the family system and how to run them successfully. In current times, it becomes all the more important when the values are waning fast. Increasing selfishness and sybaritic tendencies are seen as overpowering. People expect too much, and their feelings are now self-centred instead of being inclusive. The tendency to “me first” is getting important. Mutual sacrifices getting lesser. It leads to the thinking of keeping an account of who has done good to me blatantly.
It is not unilateral. Laws have been made to regulate property disputes and the rights of individual family members. It is good that a codified law exists and is operative. Despite this, unlawful activities are seen rising. The disputes are natural because of differences in nature. There are amicable ways of sorting them out under the law. Relationships are fragile. They need to be nurtured and taken care of, but if inevitable, people need to part ways after adopting a solution palatable to both parties.
Expecting too much is not a good practice. It hurts when expectations are not met. Instead of dogmatically leaning on one side without giving proper consideration to others is a narcissistic approach, which is a highly negative trait.
Do we like to be called negative or narcissistic?
Of course, not.
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