Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?
The post explores various dimensions of love, as depicted in the epic Ramayana and through personal anecdotes. It illustrates love’s profound nature, emphasizing its role in relationships, especially the unconditional bond between a mother and her children. It contrasts love with negative emotions like lust and greed, highlighting that love can be mutual or unilateral. The narrative reflects on the complexities of human interactions, including childhood friendships and romantic relationships, which often emerge from superficial attractions. Ultimately, true love is described as selfless, healing, and vital, particularly emphasizing the unique and irreplaceable love of a mother.
There was euphoria everywhere. The people of Ayodhya were happy as Ram, the crown prince, was to be declared king. His father, Dashrath, was becoming old, and he wanted to hand over the kingdom to the crown prince and retreat to the forest as per the custom of the time.
Suddenly things took an ugly turn. Knowing about the dissatisfaction and indignation of his queen Kaykeyie, he went to her palace to pacify her. Aghast Dashrath had to accept two promises he had given to her when she helped him in the war against demons, “Devasur Sangram”. Ram was to be exiled to the forest for fourteen years, and Bharat was to be declared as king of Ayodhya.
As his father’s wishes were his command, Ram prepared for his exile. Knowing it, his wife Sita and his younger brother Luxman also pleaded to join him. The trio was prepared for exile, but the people of Ayodhya and the royal family were very sorrowful. They pleaded with Ram not to go to the forest, but he politely refused them all; putting forth his standpoint, Ram, with his wife Sita and younger brother Luxman, left the kingdom for the forest.
The above incidents, described in the epic of Ramayana, show different hues of emotions and mutual relationships. It vividly describes filial bonds, love, infatuation, lust, and greed. Above all, it teaches that words are of paramount importance and must be adhered to. The emotions described in the above incident are the different shades of love.
Out of all emotions, love has been given paramount importance. It is a sweet emotion that produces serotonin, an important hormone that produces happiness and buoyancy and regulates other body functions like hunger, sleep, memory, learning and mood.
In absolute terms, love is bliss. It is natural, spontaneous and platonic. It does not see boundaries or sex. So long as it is absolute, it gives pleasure though in abstract form and feels good. Mixed with the wish for acquisition and ownership, it becomes lust that causes pain and sorrow. It is a feeling which has been given a name. It has been described as a feeling of attachment towards a thing or an organism.
Hate, rejection, disdain and indifference are negative feelings that are the other side of love. Love can be mutual or unilateral, selfless or selfish, passionate or dispassionate and attached or detached. Though the listed feelings are not the end. The feeling of love is diverse and many more forms be seen. It is varied, vast and displays differently in different situations. In that sense, it is not absolute but subjective.
The love and relationship of a mother with her progenies are unbounded, unconditional and dedicated. A mother, besides begetting her progenies, takes care of them and nourishes them. She becomes restless and spends sleepless nights when her child is in duress, restless or uncomfortable. The place of the mother has been considered prime among all relationships. It is the only relation; a child recognises since beginning in the womb. It is not only because the foetus draws nourishment in the safe environment of the mother’s womb but also because of an inseparable bond that developed. This bond is organic, and except for the mother, no other relationship shares it.
Mother is compassionate, benevolent and full of love. She is the one who bears every load but protects and saves her progenies from adversities. It is why our planet Earth and Nature have been equated with Mother and are considered synonymous.
In his iconic novel “Mother”, the famous writer Maxim Gorkey has vividly described Mother and her transformation. Her journey with her growing child Pavel and her adjustment to the changing times is phenomenal. It is heartwarming to see the transformation of a timid woman into an intrepid and courageous one. The suppressed and often physically assaulted by her drunkard husband, she emerges as a great protagonist. It shows how a mother can be a lighthouse for her progeny.
In higher animal groups, motherhood and parental care are distinctly seen. During the spring season, which is animals’ breeding season, too, the sight of their deep involvement in making nests, mating and rearing their progenies is seen. Taking care of their cubs by tigress or lioness and teaching them to learn the complexities of life is a heartening sight of the jungle. During my trip to a national park, it was deeply touched to see a mother rhino escorting and protecting her calf from impending danger. Animals become furious and even attack sensing a danger to their cubs or calves.
In the complex human society, interaction starts as a child grows. The start of socialization opens a new portal for the child. They start interacting while in school, in social gatherings and interacting with their peers. They exchange their feelings of love and affection by playing and fighting together and become friends instantly thereafter. It is their innocence that helps them bond together.
Friendship and its bond of love know no boundaries. Lord Krishna was the emperor of Dwarka, and his childhood friend, Sudama, was very poor. Struggling to make ends meet, Sudama was encouraged by his wife to visit the palace of his childhood friend Krishna. Hesitant but compelled, Sudama made the journey. When Krishna heard of Sudama’s arrival, he promptly ran barefoot to welcome him. This act reflects the profound depth of their friendship.
Friendship with selfless love and dedication to each other is becoming rare in human beings. As has been discussed above, love is vicious when it becomes green-eyed. Pollutants like selfishness and greed not only vitiate friendship but create a gully by eroding it deeply.
One of the most liked and talked about forms of love is romance. The word “Romantic” is a noun and pertains to the imagination. While in love the couples usually live in illusory word. They feel on cloud nine. Opposite sexes, when coming close, are attracted initially by the good looks of the individual, their particular style or anything that clicks. It ignites mutual liking or liking for the person. Within a short time, it intensifies and ends up in infatuation. The latter stage is often termed as love. Romance starts with physical attraction, and with time, it often ends in an ugly break-up because of the losing sheen.
The superficial nature and glam of love is short-lived. Its artificial glitter soon fades out. In the modern world, when society has become open and new terminology is being used to legalise various forms of relationships, the loss of shine is inevitable. Before couples can understand each other, they end up enjoying fornication. Without going into the details of Its merits or demerits, suffice it to say that eagerness and haste in establishing unsafe intimacy leads to further complications and loss of sheen.
True love is all about surrendering to each other. The suspicion and eagerness evoke interest. So long as it is wrapped in an imaginary stole of curiosity, it is evocative and attractive. It is blissful and spreads like a wisp of fragrance and spreads happiness around and in the relationship. Physical intimacy gives pleasure, sure, but the sensual pleasure soon becomes monotony and nous, and after a period of time, a feeling of dejection and disgust creeps in. Fighting stands that e up in an unholy manner.
Humans tend to have everything perfect. Romantic love is no exception. To search for perfect things, they weave a tapestry of true love in the form of romantic stories which become bestsellers in no time. Stories of Romeo-Juliet, Laila-Majnu, and Heer-Ranjha are but a few examples of the imaginary world of love.
Loving God, or an abstract body is a type which should not ask for a return. It is, though, impractical to expect pure love in the world of barter. Everyone expects something in return. To a great extent, it is natural, but true love asks for sacrifice. Expecting a unilateral love is frustrating and futile.
Love is like a healing ointment. It soothes, heals and helps in growing. Of the three loves, it is the mother whose love is unconditional and uncompromising. It has to be accepted and appreciated by all because it is she who has brought us into this world and has nourished us to become young and prudent.
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